Insidious Adaptation

"You don't know what 69 means?" This said to me by a few classmates on a walk back from the mini mart at lunch. "Yea I know what it means." I lied. "What does it mean then?" The fateful challenge, an inevitable elevation of argument. "It's drugs." I went with what I thought was most relevant at the time. (laughter erupts) I have outed myself. I in fact, do not know what 69 means. The rest of that day in 7th grade was abysmal, for I was reminded again that I was different. I was on the outside of something all the other kids knew about. How did I miss this. I couldn't help but wonder, sitting in math after lunch, consumed with the social exclusion I was feeling. After all, nobody will like me now, for not only did I not know something so obvious to everyone else, but they caught me pretending. What if they figure out other things about me? As my adolescent armpits start to erupt with moisture, I now start to fear sweating...

The browning effect ( maillard reaction)  is the caramelizing of meats through the pressure of heat. The more heat, the more brown, the less heat, the more time the browning takes. That savory, crisp of bacon as the pork’s own fat heats up and stores energy, encasing the meat in its own boiling oil, browning it to perfection. The same with a steak, burger, and better be a hot dog or brat, for the boiled versions of these are just upsetting.  Dad, be like...."Burgers are done."  What isn’t as savory and pleasing to Umami parts of the palate is friction of another kind. The kind of friction that only a vague relationship of acquaintances can create. It is not just the pressure in performing when it comes to a coworker or the stress in a passive-aggressive email, but the constant friction of a negative environment. When the comments aren’t direct, but in someone’s tone, or the words like chisels, carving the now-hardened exterior. When the gifts of celebration are so va...

Look at her, miserable. She probably hates it here.  “Why can’t I find a place where people want to work?" Uh, scratch that.  When you are sad, everything is dismal. As though the very paint that paints the world is that of a flat brown and any color attempted to paint over it, pale, flat as well. The picture exists, it forms the same structure after all, but there is no vibrancy. What is lacking is the essence of flavor, the subtle aroma of fresh smells and exciting possibilities. Sadness makes anything negative seem possible, takes away a compliment, and instead of trying to get out, the self-defeat prevents much of what little effort is had. I can only write these words by being in the state of sadness, an extreme, acute, feeling that comes and goes. Possibly from over exertion, or some dietary restriction, which happens. All to often the sadness is remedied through my spiritual connection with God and what he wants for me, but this one lingered longer, maybe long enough...

Risk it all, for the likelihood of getting caught is small, right? What drives a man to even ask? Is it God, his principals, long-standing beliefs he would die for? Is it a self-sacrifice where the whims of desire fall short to convictions? Or, is he driven strictly by selfish desires, fueling the mind to feast on something that it was never meant to. Lust doesn't always look like this... This isn’t to say that good men don’t have wandering eyes or minds, but that they become aware and know where that goes. The good men are humble enough to admit fault and do something about it. The good men are able to understand that it is painful and a lot of work to stay convicted and live according to these principles, however it is everything they stand for and to give in, means giving in on self. A man without his beliefs is nothing at all. It isn’t the wandering, nor is it the environment, but the possibility that lingers. Looking at a woman on a magazine cover, beautiful, sultry, pre...

The chemistry of fat is that of a carbon chain, up to 24, with Hydrogen attached. Saturated fats mean that all the Carbon elements are attached to each other with a single bond and the element is, "saturated" with Hydrogen. This is different than, mono, or poly unsaturated fats  in which, in one location (mono) there is a carbon to carbon double bond and a lack of hydrogen, or multiple areas, (poly) where this same thing occurs. Click Here for a whole bunch of info. The difference in each of these chemical structures isn't the elements involved, but the amount and strength of bonds that are involved that makes the difference. Carbon, Hydrogen, Nitrogen, in their elemental forms are the basis for all organic material and are not poisonous. However, in the right concentration or combination, kill a human with ease. The carbon to carbon bond, when the valence electrons combine with the nearest carbon in a chain of them rather than a hydrogen, does a completely different t...

Smoke lingers in the thick, damp air. Wafts of sulfur and burning paper fill the olfactorys of a town celebrating. The kids run around with fire sticks, adults gather and drink from cans, bottles, large stainless steel containers with a pump on top. The animals are scarce, avoiding the flash and bang from the larger fire sticks. Celebrations of a victory erupt across individual city blocks neighborhoods, towns all throughout the land declaring unity and its freedom. We get to do this... Happy Birthday America, for you truly are the greatest nation in the history of the world. Established by men who went against oppression, the wrong they were seeing, to produce the documents that built the nation today. For even, Benjamin Franklin, a Deist declared, "I have lived, Sir, a long time, and the longer I live, the more convincing proofs I see of this truth- that God Governs in the affairs of men. And if a sparrow cannot fall to the ground without his notice, is it probable that a...

Like a piece of meat in a pool of sharks. Nashing, bodying, pushing, insufficient altruism, yet no contempt, simply survival. The human male is worse, for we have the knowhow, the insight, to know that   when we harm or bully another for something they have or a resource we all want, it can get personal. Sorry Larry. This one's mine.  Like a girl in the gym, sports bra, toned midsection, tight, trendy yoga pants accenting all features of self, men clamoring, trying to vie for the affection, but attention will suffice. Every man has their reason, some for lust, strictly sexual, others for attention, for if this apparently confident and attractive girl is interested in me, she might fulfill what I don’t see in myself. Other men want to show for other men and be the dominant one, the one to gain the attention of the quietly-agreed upon head lioness. The difference between Animal Planet and the Real World, is intent. Man’s intent is not to merely mate, despite the argument ...