Insidious Adaptation

Why must it be like this? Why can I not just have my cake and eat it too? Why must there be this tether to the middle preventing me from going too far in one direction, no matter the motive, yanking me back with a painful reminder of my imbalance? I only want to eat a little more, or workout a little less, things that my logical mind knows it has to do, but the other part of me, my emotional side, says “no.” This battle, like two divorced parents fighting for custody simply to spite the other, weighs in my mind like a stone unmovable. No, I will not wake up one day, skip the gym and lack anxiety about getting fat later, and no I will not go to the gym excessively and not be fatigued or consumed by old behaviors, no matter how much I romanticize a return to the 2-hour gym sessions twice a day. Neither of these will occur, nor will I ever rid my mind of this part of me, as apparent as my own personality. In fact, it is my personality, my temperament even, for man does not compartmentali...

"A bold move." Some will say.  "I don't agree, and F that guy pushing his views on me with a title like that!" Scream others.  "Ah, what a nice young man." Say those who might know of me, yet wouldn't read the post.  "I don't like his writing." As more scroll by with enough on their wall today to write their own books.  What are we missing here? Where is that Lego block we thought we had, misplaced, the piece of the puzzle, critical to the complete picture, we just can't find? What did we just spend four hours on, if not to finish this thing? Why did we wait until the last piece to figure out if there is even a possible conclusion?  Life is such an all expansive view of an entire existence summed into these four little letters. For some, they decide to equate their life to four larger, more adult letters, the first one s and the last t, yes, there it is. Whether we are choosing to have this s--t life o...